2018 - Falling back in love

As we are at the end of 2018 I wanted to reflect. Instead of listing my favourite books this year, I want to celebrate falling back in love with books and finding a community that I feel I'm hopefully becoming part of and absolutely loving! 

On the evening of January 1st 2018  I set myself some aims for the year ahead. Some I have not quite achieved, others I believe should be a continuous aim no matter the year but for me, the most important was what I put at number 4.

4. Read at least one book a month. 

Falling back in love with books :

One of my earliest memories is going to the library, my small chubby little hands selecting books and taking them home to read. I read to my Mum, I read to my nursery teachers but mainly, I read by myself. I was always at my happiest with a book in hand.  When my sister and I were young we shared a bedroom, we'd be sent to be at 7.30pm and out would come my book (working my way through childhood classics, Nancy Drew and then onto my Mum's Catherine Cookson books amongst many more). Hours later, I would still be reading when Dad came up to bed himself; I'd quickly hide my book under the covers as he came into turn off the light. I always thought I'd got away with it and he didn't have a clue. Looking back, he probably did know just never said anything.

Years ago I went through a very low and unhappy time, I lost my husband, Adrian, suddenly and unexpectedly. I became a widow at 27 years old and was totally shattered. The day before my husband died I had read a book by an author I loved, I won't say who or name the book, but the story centred around the character losing her husband suddenly and I remember being completely unable to comprehend how that would feel, I enjoyed the book but was unable to really connect with that character - little did I know less than 24 hours later I would. 

I know this will sound ridiculous but I blamed the book. How idiotic was I... to think that me reading a book caused something to happen, as though me contemplating such a devastating event had actually brought it into reality. I know this was just shock, grief and my own kind of crazy at play but I did think it, if only at my lowest, darkest times (when sleep deprivation was everything!) - I do realise how ridiculous it sounds, honest.

Grief broke me and for a long, long time I felt as though I was existing in a bubble. Nothing  held my interest anymore. I felt completely alien to myself, the things I had always found enjoyment in no longer did so, my ability to concentrate disappeared and my love for books just seemed to fade.  The one constant in my life, since being tiny, was my passion for books and reading but now I was not interested anymore and didn't feel I would be again. 

Fast forward a little. It's been years now.. my husband died in 2011 but it has taken me a really long time to get back to a version of myself I truly recognise. That's why this year has been so special. I have started reading again and I mean properly reading; the kind I always did, where books absorbed my interest and concentration so much the world around me disappeared. I began spending time in the library and finding comfort in books I have previously loved, authors I have adored. 2018 has been the year a massive part of the old me came back with a vengeance. 

It started with a visit to the library in July. I don't always pay attention to what books I'm picking up - I grab an armful and check out then I enjoy taking my time to look at my selections. This time I'd unknowingly selected a couple of authors I'd never read before. To say I devoured these books is an understatement, I'd read and placed holds on everything else I could find of theirs in the library by the end of the night.  From this I had an idea - what if I started a little blog so I could write up what I thought of the books I read? I didn't really have a clue what to do but jumped in and started this blog (I am still learning really... ) I started a twitter account (@thecomfychair2)  dedicated to the blog and with the hope of connecting with like-minded people and finding new authors.  

The rest is pretty apparent via this blog. I've read and reviewed more books this year than any year since my husband died. I have a TBR pile that is bigger than I've ever had been and it excites me to think about adding more. I'm discovering new authors all the time, I'm trying genres I wouldn't necessarily go near before. 
Plus I smashed my reading challenge on Goodreads (not started until way into the year!) Connecting with people on Twitter has been a highlight of the year. So many wonderful people, discussing books, promoting authors, supporting each other. I know realistically that I'm a little pebble in the ocean of great bloggers, book lovers etc but I enjoy the connections I have made so far and going into 2019 I am excited by what is to come. I can't wait to hear about new books, find more authors I haven't read before and hopefully make more like-minded 'friends.' 

I have two authors to THANK for being that spark back in July, that reignited my love of all things books (although plenty more have now helped to reinstall my passion for reading). I hope they don't mind me saying so and I don't want to embarrass them but I wanted to acknowledge their work, to show how their hard work does have an impact in ways they may not have realised.  Heidi Swain and Jane Linfoot - Thank you.  

Please check out their books and follow them on Twitter:
Heidi Swain - https://twitter.com/Heidi_Swain 
Jane Linfoot - https://twitter.com/janelinfoot

I have fallen back in love with reading, with books and I can't wait for the reads that 2019 will bring.

"Whenever you read a good book, somewhere in the world a door opens to allow in more light."

–Vera Nazarian

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